Over these years I have learned to be much better about speaking my mind to the wrong people and about putting both feet in the mouth at once. Can't say it has always been that way and I have sometimes hard to learn a hard lesson about confidences and restraint in acting out of anger. Like toothpaste out of the tube, its near impossible to get back in.

But before you go thinking I have done something, I haven't. My reflections are of a period quite a while ago and my personal journey toward diplomacy.

I had a birthday last week. Not uncommon, we all seem to have one if we are lucky enough to be alive. I often don't do well with birthdays, they remind me of the past, about time and opportunities that have passed, they remind me of people no longer here and people no longer in my life. I also just don't feel comfortable with the fuss, though it is not that I dislike it. It fact, to the probable surprise of most I actually like it. (Go figure) I can be a rather unpleasant person (though not overtly) in my wallowing reflections and I am unfortunately one of those people who is useless when it comes to thinking up ideas for gifts. I feel rather blessed that I do not want for much and that my needs are relatively modest. The things that I think I want can't be packaged.

My best birthdays are usually when I am distracted doing something for someone else or involved in a family activity.



This past birthday was not without its reflections and I am still in that valley (mostly now because of thoughts related to work and career), but the actual day was pretty good.

Starting off with a good 4 mile run, something I couldn't do 10 years ago and then function for the rest of the day; then volunteering at a church cleaning / maintenance day. Hauling trash and changing ceiling tiles and cleaning light fixtures pumps the blood through that upper body movement and the accomplishment can be seen immediately. Then off to half time show to watch my youngest and her band mates march and play followed by dinner out with most of the family (sans the one who is away at college, :-( , though I got to talk with him that night :-) and of course cake and presents.

By mid day my mood was up quite a bit and my reflections were much more of being grateful what what I had and the experiences and people that enabled me to do what I did that day.


"Perhaps he knew , as I did not, that the Earth was made round so that we would not see too far down the road....." A good quote. Perhaps I shall write about it someday.