Reflections,,,,after a dunking

A couple of free hours this morning and the inspiration to take out the kayak. It has been so hectic that this is the first time this year, so the bugs and cobwebs needed to be vacated. Placing it in the water I felt so out of practice and as I put one foot in and got ready to push off, just as I had done dozens of times before, the boat tipped and in I went. Drenched and looking at 4+ inches of sluggy water in the kayak and standing in a foot of silt. Most everything was tied down so nothing was lost and fortunate my camera and phone were in plastic bags.

In the 3 years I have had the kayak and launched it more time than I can count, this is the first time I had ever gotten wet, and of course their were 2 people standing by offering help and suggesting how to I might successfully get in. How embarrassing.

So after draining the water out the plug and sopping most of the rest with my now soggy towels, I head down river. It was then also that I remembered that that I should have taken a picture of the mess, but back then I wasn't thinking that way.

As I was paddling, I kept noticing how much more I was seeing looking across the water, rather than up on the shore.


The reflections in the water were vivid and the picture above perfectly joined with the one below. The water was a mirror.


The top and the bottom became one picture.





It was so quiet and the water so smooth that I found I could get up closer to animals than usual. I was about 10 feet away from this heron as he decided I had come close enough.





The turtle sunning out on the rock let me pass before diving in. He was back on the rock when I came back, watching me with caution but knowing he could dive in quicker than I could get to him.


The banks were lines with yellow daisies and purple millfoil.





When the air was perfectly still there was not a ripple.


Monet is one of my favorite artists and this shot and the ripples of the image seemed to have a similar feeling, even if it is upside down.

Someone I know who is several years younger than me was just diagnosed with Lymphocytic Leukemia; a friend who thought cancer was completely in gone years ago finds a lump; a coworker, also younger than me, is a candidate for a pacemaker; a close family member is looking at potential foot surgery; 120 people at the local hospital just lost their jobs, my daughter come back from a trip a speaks of witnessing poverty in the midst of vast wealth and of how some of her friend here can't grasp of life changing such witnessing is.

I just finished a 4 mile run, am getting ready for an afternoon of biking with my son and an evening at Tanglewood.

There is so much that I can't control and can't change and in comparison with what others face, my issues and problems seem pretty insignificant. I can be mindful and appreciate the gifts I have and recognize them as gifts.

"Isn't it fun that the cars stop when you are in the cross walk?"

Coming out of the library in the center of our little town, I overheard a mom saying to her son, as the family walked down the sidewalk, "Isn't it fun that the cars stop when you are in the cross walk?"

It made me smile as I too walked down to Main Street and as I approached the road and stepped into the crosswalk, the cars on both sides stopped. I did my half wave of acknowledgment and proceeded.

I think I was at first caught by the word "fun" in this comment then by the reality of the observation. We aren't a theme park with artificial behavior and sets though this town is more touristy than many due to its many cultural attractions. I often wonder what these tourists think we are as "locals". We are for the most part just like them I came from the library picking up a couple of books and a new book on CD for my commute. I was doing routine errands.

The second part of my thoughts was this person's actual observation. It is state law that cars stop for pedestrians in a crosswalk and the local cops do at times enforce it as do the citizens. Out of state cars that are oblivious, even thought there is a sandwich board sign at the crosswalk saying to stop, will get a comment or shout. It also is just a courtesy. something we practice and something we expect from visitors.

My daughter just came back from a week in Pennsylvania with a youth group and in the city, the chaperones reminded them that the rules aren't the same and cars don''t necessarily stop for anyone.

The flip side are tourists who think this is a theme park and will just walk right out into the street also oblivious that this is a thoroughfare or people who will walk down the middle of some of the streets where shops are. It's a small town with perhaps a slower pace but really, you can't be stupid. Though as I drive through downtown, it is now intuitive and what we teach out teenage drives, to watch the road but also the walkers approaching the road.

So, I am glad if that family is having fun here. Just be safe, be courteous and if you are eating at some of the local restaurants, leave good tips for my kids.

I was blog wandering a little while ago and came back to a blog I hadn't visited in quite a while and the writer's self discussion was about the expression or lack of expression of creative talent.

This is one of those one sided discussions I have had many times with myself, so I can appreciate it.

If you know people who have a very clear creative identity or focus it can be intimidating to those of us who dabble or lack the confidence and time to explore. I happen to know several people who have such talent and it makes me less likely to be "out there" exploring my artsy side or at least publicizing it. It is not anything that they do, its all about me "not measuring up".

I think I am like many who wish they could find the vehicle that appeals to the masses and provides some positive reinforcement to continue. Do we all wish we could be a Monet'?

It is much easier for someone who is called an artist to be one than it is someone who is viewed as not, to be one.

This blog serves somewhat of an outlet for my creative side. The pictures, the words, the layout. It is somewhat anonymous to all but a handful of people who have "found" me. It speaks to a very different "me" than the person many people know me in a very calm, measured , analytical work role, though as Debbie pointed out a while ago this blog does draw on the serious side of me.

Though I carry a clown nose around in my day bag (yes I really do have a red nose in my bag) and am know by those close to me to have an unpredictable zany side, that doesn't often come across through artful expression. Why is that?

I can be very creative in my professional work,and though it can consume enormous amounts of time, it is often viewed with connectedness to the main part of my job, though it really isn't and I again am confined back in my "box".

People often see the person in the role they are familiar with , who may be creative and assume it must be connected to his job, and not that this is a very creative individual both inside and outside of the "job box".

When we had someone over for dinner a while back, my wife happened to use some pottery pieces I made and mentioned that I had. There was amazement, as I didn't seem the type though I'd done it for several years. I also draw and am a creative cook both of which also seem to be out of character

So like this fellow blogger, I continue not only to find ways to be creative but how to be out there and be creative and be invited to do things requiring creativity and not just viewed from the confines of this box.

Ice Glen

Last fall, October 16th to be precise, I posted some pictures of a bridge over the river and trail I found at the end of a dead end road. Across the bridge were some railroad tracks and across that some trails led into the woods.

Well a week or so ago I learned the rest of the story.

Looking for a place for a family outing, my wife suggested a hike in a spot she had found about named ice glen. It was in the 90s so any place with the name "ice" had to be appealing. It was outside of Stockbridge down a side road with a bridge leading to the trail. At first I couldn't figure out where it was until we started talking directions I discovered that it was the trail on the other side of the tracks.


Waling up a steady incline into the wood it just seemed to be getting warmer, until the shade made it darker and the



until the rock walls appeared and the trail dropped into a narrow ravine. The walls of stone were actually huge rocks piled that created deep caves in the walls, vents into the deeper earth.
Passing each cave the temperature dropped and a cool moist air seemed to pour out. The moisture feeding the green foliage and cool air feeling like an air conditioner.


Some of the steep walls were covered in moss and ferns and small plants clung to the sides well anchored almost like a terrarium .


The trail moved up and down through the rocks with the caves at the base somewhat ominous in what nocturnal wild life might be within. The base seemed almost like a stream bed, which in the spring I expect it is. Draining into the underground caves and cascading down to the river we crossed over.

The writeup said that snow could sometimes be found into the summer. I can imagine that, though the steady heat of the past few weeks eliminated that chance.

An amazing sight and experience, so removed and quiet and cool yet so close to the "beaten path" .

One never knows what is at the end of a trail.

The forth of July is often the official start of the tourist season here. In addition to it being a long holiday weekend this year, it is also referred by many locals as "James Taylor weekend" .

Tanglewood (summer home of the Boston Symphony Orchestra ) is the behemoth of tourists draws here, so until it opens the tourist business is on the sluggish side. Having kids that now work in local restaurants, we have become attuned to things like this. There are many theater and other cultural venues in the immediate area but none are a large or draw the crowds like Tanglewood.

While the BSO season officially starts next week, one of the big Tanglewood events in the popular music series is James Taylor and this year with Carole King. The sold out concerts bring many thousands of out-of towners. In a past year, Taylor teamed with John Williams and the BSO for movie night and the crowds were so large that highways and local roads were jammed and the symphony itself had difficulty getting there. Subsequently a local ordinance was passed requiring a cap of ticket sales at I believe 18,000 and when that is reached, it must be marketed as sold out and signs are on the highways. This year it is 2 concerts so the crowds will be spread out but still the max is reached and one of the concerts is a charity event with the proceeds going back to the BSO.

So as drove through town this morning to drop off one kid for breakfast waitstaff job the increase in numbers and runners on the streets was noticeable. If you were from the city you'd think nothing of it, but this is a small town and even a slight increase in people is noticable.

Tomorrow is my 3rd 5k race. It is part of the beginning of the 4th of July Parade in Pittsfield, one of the largest in the country complete with floats and big balloons. It is interesting being in this race as there are already hundreds lining the parade route clapping as a thousand runners come along.

My attitude has really changed since my first race. Then I wanted to make sure I didn't come in
dead last. Now I am pretty confident about the distance and its more about seeing if I can trim some time off of last year's time. I have more experience and training though I also have one more year on me. It will be fun and I often see all sorts of people either in the race or on the side that I never expect to see.

Happy 4th of July all.

Thanks, all is well. I even discovered my pipe leak and have so far fixed it without a plumber, without any holes in the walls and with a single screw. Fingers, toes and eyes crossed that this does it long term.

I will tell some of the story if I can figure out how to tell it in less than a full page. I very short, I am aware of others who are in situations of bad health, injury, unemployment, turmoil and in more than a few situations can think of how I an my family might be very different had an occurrence in my past taken a very slightly different turn and the turns were a matter of happening when and how they did rather than choices made.

It not only makes me grateful for the turn that my situation took and then also how I took it from there, but also open to repaying and feeding the good karma and energy in the world that enabled this.

There but for the grace of God and the fate of occurrences, is me.

It may be good, may be bad, it may be life changing........ We may realize based on another's experience that started similar to ours but proceeded very differently, that we really "dodged a bullet".

I know that at least in most of these "life changing experiences" that I have come through with a different awareness, a better appreciation for what other's might be going through, a broader depth of knowledge and strength. And also out of those has come a need to pass this on where I can.

It feels like summer. Cold weather seems so far away yet there is still a bag of pellets near the store just in case. The bees are out buzzing among the flowers making a noise that can be hear from a distance. Good to see them and hear them around.

I seem to be running a streak of things breaking and rebreaking. The post about the leak was a new break but hitting on the list it takes on more significance and AGGGG factor. The struts on the old car replaced 6 months ago at an obscene amount, one side breaks again a month or so later and needs to be replaced and a couple of weeks ago the other side starts to make noises again and I have to make time to take the car in and get that fixed. Then the self propel on the lawn mower breaks, get fixed and return and after one mow breaks again. Send it back and yesterday while calling to find out when its coming back as the lawn is growing quick, I have the discussion of "well you know these things are built that strongly and can't always be fixed............." Why didn't they tell me before putting in a new blade and doing a full tune up". I'll continue that discussion tomorrow when the mechanic is in.

So I am thinking that I need to rid the place of bad spirits, if that is what is going on. Do a few chants and smoke the buggers out and perhaps I'll get a few more ants in the process. In the mean time I'll enjoy the rain and be thankful that it is really it that is preventing the lawn from being mowed.

The joys of home ownership.......I jest.

I went looking to find the source of the ant...because there have been a few more lately than should be given the amount of ant spray and powder around and in the process discover a leak. because we live surrounded by woods, carpenter ants abound and must be kept out less the devour the place. I say this by experience having had to replace back section of a wall that had been eaten completely from stud to plywood and even into the cedar clapboards. They are drawn by water and love to dig into wet or dame wood.

So good you might think as I have possibly discovered a problem, but not the source. Broken dishwasher perhaps. Whew, not that. Sink, not that. What else could be on this line, crap..an upstairs bathroom. The leak is not a feed pipe but a drain pipe, which make absolutely no sense unless it somehow in leaking from an elbow. The last thing I want to do is call a plumber to do the investigative work. I work for free, they certainly don't and are tough to get.

For the better park of this holiday afternoon I have been snaking pipes, cutting sections out of drywall under the sink, being the investigator trying different things and ruling out the possibilities. Water flows, so it isn't clogged and backing up. It drips 3 feet across from the original drop of the pipe in the wall which means it should be turning in the ceiling and then turning again to go down the outside wall as the drip is happening on the outside wall, which means that the leak in happening at least 6 feet into the line after it has turned 3 times.

Now I am stumped and it is getting late. Time to clean up and take my second shower fro the day.......drain grunge is smelly and gets all over. Perhaps a gin and tonic will help me thing of the next option or forget it for the day.

Happy Memorial Day! Thank you to all for whom this day is marked for your commitment and for the gift you have bestowed on this nation.

The signs of early summer. The mists gathering over the river and drifting up to the top of the mountain, meeting the clouds above. The sunrise painting the picture with streaks of orange and blue.

A storm moving in over the lake. The wind blowing through the hills making the sound of the waves on the shore of the ocean. It feels so much like summer though it is definitely still spring. Frost warnings last week and then up to the 90s.



So that was the weather report....... How often when we aren't sure how to start a conversation, we talk about the weather. It's common to us all, non controversial and if you live in a climate such as I do, it is always changing and sometimes less predictable from one town to the next.

Its been a busy time but not. The family is back together for the summer and I find much inner joy and comfort in that. While my son was away at college there was this solar powered light that I had placed far back in the yard next to the fire pit that he often used in the evening alone or with friends. I had no reason to place it there last year other than being curious about how it worked and whether it would work. Though very small and dim, I could see this light in the distance from my bedroom as I went to bed and if I woke in the night. The light in the distance became "him" far away, yet close and I felt comforted seeing glimpses of it, a connection that kept him close in my heart.

Interesting, that since he has been back the light doesn't seem to be working any more. Perhaps the bulb is burned out or its that the light is now on inside.

When it gets very busy and somewhat crazy and I feel like there are so many issues and needs and demands and when I feel stuck and my mind feels like it is on overload and ready to explode, it is the simple things I gravitate to, such as that light in the distance. Though symbolic, it is about what is important and about who is important. So though the car may not be able to be replaced as soon as I might like or some demands and wants of others not be able to be met and yeah I will feel guilty if I feel I have let someone down (though probably not really to anyone but me) and some things may settle out fine as they often do; it is things like the light in the far back of the yard that reminds me of what is really and truly important and keep me grounded.

Weather wise this week it has been one of extremes. Starting the week off with this stuff coming down and covering the ground. It kept on coming after I left for work and while it went on for several hours more it just wasn't cold enough for it to stay around, unlike parts of Vermont that got a foot of snow.



Chilly was the key word for much of the week, frost and cold enough that the pellet stove was going regularly.

Then we hit today and it 85 and gorgeously sunny. I went out for an 8 mile run this morning and left the camera behind. I only felt like doing a short distance until I got to the stop sign near my house and instead of going straight (which is my 3 mile loop) I had an impulse to go left down the hill. At the bottom of this long hill I normally would have taken a right (which makes another 4 mile loop home. But instead, on impulse I headed straight and across a footbridge and figured I'd run around the pond at the base of October Mountain State forest. But then I came to a road that I'd passed x-c skiing several times and decided to take that turn. It went up into the forest (the road is paved so its not totally uncivilized), past fields and lakes I'd never seen before, past houses I never knew were there, past a big sand pit that I'd only seen from the distance and from the other side. The road went up and up and around 'til it came to a picnic area and the ranger office in the other entrance to the park.

The sign on the office board said 2.5 miles to the pond where I been so that was the decision time. I was feeling good but 2.5 miles out meant 2.5 miles back plus the mile up the hill to get home. So I walked around a bit, picked up a park map to see where I was and headed back home and took another detour to check out another path that I had wondered about.

A beautiful morning to be out, got to see an area I had never seen and before the heat of the day and all because I followed impulse to take a turn I hadn't before.

Something profound about that.




The moon was big this week as well but unfortunately my point and click camera shrinks even the biggest things and that's when the zoom is on.

The trees are beginning to fill in and for that brief moment in time there are beautiful views of the mountains and fields that are softened by the light green of spring.

One big thing that sold us on buying the house we are in now was the yard. The house itself is fine, much newer than the money pit we had left behind, on a quiet dead end street and located in a town where real estate retains value and is one of the better school districts in the state. But the house itself, when we saw it, had enormous bird cages in the family room and most of the room were very dark wallpaper, including rooms with only one window facing north and it has electric heat, which in New England draws is costly.





But in a town with a limited number of mid priced houses you make compromises. The irony of our decision to live here for the schools comes back to us on a regular basis as although we live less than a half mile from the high school, neither one of our kids ended up going there. As this is a public blog, I won't get into it much but there are challenges when you don't fit the mold in a very small town and though the schools are great, our kids thrived in a neighboring district 20 minutes away(you can go out of district at no cost) with a larger more diverse population and a broader curriculum.



How hind sight gets you. Had we known a dozen year ago about the job situation and the schools we might have moved somewhere very different.

But that rainy day when we looked at the house a second time, I walked to the back of the yard with the kids, while my wife was in the house. It was the softness of the trees that isolated and defined the property but didn't cut it off and the uneven grade of the land creating pathways and coves that was magical.



But living so near the woods has challenges as the woods is always seeking to reclaim the land, I never realized how much work property is, especially when your power equipment consists of a push mower and a Jeff powered rake and saw. Its good exercise and the kids pitch in when they have the time. But the clearing of all the debris from the winter and spring is where the burning season comes in.

From January through April, with a cheap permit, you can burn. So handling the dead limbs that are always falling and clipping back the bushes that seem to gain 3-4 feet of year each summer as well as disposing of the Christmas tree and wood pellet pallets becomes possible.

I think burning tends to be more of a primal guy thing, having the blazing fire and chopping and hauling wood and brush. It definitely is satisfying seeing things get cleaned up from the winter and the big piles disappear. Plus and area of grass that was previously just weed has a chance to come back seeded.



I know that when the kids are off to college and it is time to downsize there will be some things I'll miss about the house. But it will be the yard that I know I will miss.

Sitting out on the back porch listening to the wind, the animals trouping through, the views of Mt. Greylock in the winter through the bare trees, the way the fog settles between the trees and the blossoms of the trees in spring; camp fires in the back with kids gathering around; the way it connects with the woods and forest and a times becomes one.



I think by then the maintenance will have worn me a bit, as I feel it more and more now, but it will always be something special.

So two posts in one day...wow. I was a little on the rushed side this morning having decided to go out for a run and then start on my lists of things to do only to look at the clock and see I had to run out for a few hours. A blurrr!

I have been working on paperwork most of the afternoon. I deal with so much paperwork at work that I am usually loathed to do it at home. But then it backs up. Its tax time and financial aide filing time and I have wrap up a major project as part of volunteer school group, so there is enough to keep me busy for a while. So as I look out in the sunny yard and the rest of the family is off doing more enjoyable things I am doing this. But it is all for a good cause.

This post isn't about complaining, in fact it is about the opposite. I tend to be a "glass is half full" type of guy. Not that I don't complain or feel sorry for myself at times, but I usually get around to the positive and usually try to find the positive in what is going on around me. Sometimes its difficult and sometimes easy and many times it just takes shifting your perspective a bit.

The last couple of weeks I have been feeling like the cheerleader. At work there are major systems upgrades going on and as staff complain that the new features aren't working the way they want, I am pointing out that the new features are finding errors that the old version didn't and once they are fixed it will run fine. Also that while the testing it a pain, it is going mostly well. Rah rah rah!

I'm a parent volunteer for a school a major event (6 shows) that has just been completed for the year. It took more than 3 months and lots of work to put on and many weekend of some people doing things couldn't do and I did things I'd rather not have had to do, but hey we do it for the kids. While most forks were great, I repeatedly heard from a certain group about the parents who wouldn't do "anything" or about the ones who were just willing to bring food for the day long rehearsals or to sell at the shows. Yeah there are always a certain number that don't help out in just about any community endeavor but there were lots of people that in fact were helping out in ways that they could and for some that way was food and say bless them for that gift because that means the rest of us don't have to do it. I also knew that for some of the kids involved that this was a really important thing developmentally and socially to be part of, that their family lives were on the dysfunctional side and there was no way their parents would help. If they were pressured then they would pull their kid from participating. Why is it that we could see this yet the complainers could not?

So each time I heard a complaint, I'd make the correction about how many people I have seen helping out and try to give the positive spin. I 'm not even going to talk about the people that don't help because some of that just becomes gossip.

Then I hear that they really wanted was more people with specific skills. So don't dump on the people who help because you want more people to do something else.

At that point I asked for stage time ( I can be nicely pushy at times) and prepped my "thank you" to all the volunteers that helped out and then did the plug for next year. I heard no more complains for the remainder of the shows. The complainers knew where I stood.

This morning I head off to church and things are different, people are in different places in the church, the music is different and someone forgets to do something at a key moment. I had to smile as I saw people maneuvering around human obstacles and waiting longer than usual and I could almost hear the complaining and I am sure it will be heard later.

Trying to keep a calm sense, I thought of the biblical stories of the time right after the Crucifixion and the chaos and disorder that must have been felt by the apostles and followers of Jesus. Here it is the week after Easter and we too have a little bit of chaos and disorder, how appropriate.

I must admit that being cheerleader is wearing and after a while I want to escape and just be somewhere where no one is going to complain and I find myself slipping into a mood that is that of a crank. The scanner at the grocery store is slow, the car behind me is always too close, the glass is nearing the half empty stage. That is when I need a break.

For now, having been out in the wonderful spring weather, having filed my taxes and organized piles of paper into what it should be, there is still a lot I didn't accomplish this weekend. But there also a lot I did.

So for now I'll get off my soap box. My mission continues, to try to look on the bright side of life, to try not to dwell in the pits too long when things have me down and continue to look for the opportunities and doors that open and not just look at the doors that closed.

So where the hell have I been? I can't recall in the 3 year life of this blog being away for this long. Time accelerates and distance between seems less until you look.

I just got back from a 4 mile run into town. (well actually by now its a few hours ago) Between volunteer commitments on the weekends and several nights and a more hectic work schedule, the time and energy for runs has bee sparse. It help that I keep a log of every time I run with the distance and time to keep a visual reminder of how long its been and what impact the lapse has had on my times.

It a bright sunny morning and has to be in the mid 50s, which is clearly spring and that seems unusual for early April. The past week has been up in the 60s which is definitely unusual, but I'll take it. The forsythia is in bloom, which when I look at photos from last year, came a few weeks later. The daffodils are blooming in the yard and that has been known to not happen til May.


As I ran around in the little downtown of Lenox I was thinking how similar this is to areas like Cape Cod. (I run in one side look around a large circle the run back out to the "other side of town" where we live.) I am sure I have written about this before but it always strike me how life in a tourist area goes on outside the "show" that is for the tourists. There were a few tourists are around (you can tell by the out of state cars) but clearly off season.

The town of Lenox has a small village center but also has a good amount of area outside and the tourists mostly know the village and the "downtown" as all there is to the town. There seem to be more empty store fronts and for rent signs around. Some businesses that just can't make it over the dry spells of the winter and especially January and February which is really dead. Others were places where you knew the business owner had been trying to sell or retire for a while and eventually just closed when the lease ran out. There are still several restaurants and galleries that have been around for years and they seem to have enough of a following with the locals to pull them through the winter.

It will be interesting to see what returns and reopens in the later spring. As a local who works out of the area, the openings of closing of businesses in the business has been more of a remote interest but having two kids who have relied on the local tourist industry for summer jobs makes it more personal than it has been in the past.

More later as now I dash out for another Sunday morning volunteer assignment, I am recycling guy at church this week.

Did you ever have a time when you knew the exact right thing to say to someone who was feeling down on themselves?

Today I had that experience while chatting with a colleague who is also more of a friend. We've known each other for several decades of our careers, crossing paths multiple times until we now work together.

We were chatting about a work issue, then I asked him some questions about tuition tax credits. A strange segue perhaps, but his kids are a little older than mine so he's been at this college financing stuff longer than I. That got us off into talking about our various kids and how they were doing and the choices they are making and the lives they are building and how the role as parent continues to change with as they grow and mature. He was saying how he marveled at his kids, especially his oldest and at the choices he was making and the person he was becoming.


Then, closing the door first, he said somewhat wistfully to me, , "I tend to be a little too cynical and negative at times and I am never sure if I am a good person or a bad person inside; and I think my son is becoming a better person than me."

Well he does tend to be a little too cynical at times and I've joked with him about that, but I also know him as someone who is a caring ethical person, husband, Dad and son.

What immediately came me, and what I said in response, was a phrase I had read this week; that it is the good person who is attuned and cares about whether he is doing good or bad and continually reassesses his actions and adapts. It is the bad person doesn't care.

I think most of us wonder at times if we are more bad than good, more harsh or critical than not. I guess that's why we are a work in process.

Spring is definitely here and as I think about it, that is unusual. Usually we bounce around in an out of winter and then right into early summer. Because we live at a higher elevation spring and summer comes later than the lower areas. But this past week has been glorious. Warm and sunny and the sun is up later, I've even been able to take some late afternoon runs, which always brighten the spirit.

Last week or so ago we went through several days of high winds. I've written about the wind here, as it is fairly constant and can be quite active.

I had just cleared the yard of all the branches brought down over the winter and gad enough to keep a fire going for hours and then wind came and blew down much much more and the yard looks like I never done anything.

Another thing that it blew down were pine cones. Hundreds and hundreds of them.



All around the yard and in the woods there is almost a layer. More so than I can recall.



From a distance they look like a mole or something similar until you realize they aren't moving.

Looking high in the trees there are still plenty up there and who knows when they will join the rest.

I recall when we lived in a house with oak trees that would go through cycles and would dump so many acorns that I used a snow shovel and barrel to clean them up.
I am sure there is a similar cycle for pine trees and cones.

A Hike up Monument Mountain

As the sun gets brighter and hangs around more each day winter is retreating and spring advancing. Though if you looked at the 6 inches of snow in my yard you might think it is advancing on the slow side. But as the day time temperatures are hitting the 50s snow and ice (in other places) is turning to water.

I have a couple days off and my plans on at least one of them was to spend some time with my son who is home on break. Our first idea was cross country skiing, but the conditions are mediocre with a strange combination of ice and slush and mud. So we decided on a hike up Monument Mountain, a local mount ridge that we have pass almost every day dropping someone off at school. He had been up it a few time but I never had. At an elevation of almost 1800 feet is has some great views and the trails up across and down offer several miles of good exercise, which I was in need of.




Deciding to start off the shorter route, which means more quicker up hills, there was a combination of snow and ice and frozen ground. Much more of a challenge the the soft yielding ground of summer. This meant climbing more rocks and occasionally getting off the trail to pull yourself up the side through the snow with the assist of friendly saplings and roots. A much more vigorous approach than a potentially average climb.




The sound of a stream could be heard but not seen until much further up as it had a thick covered in ice and snow and the sound we heard was echoing from below. When it was finally reveled, its racing waters cut though the hard rock.


Further up the stream made a waterfall that was completely caked in ice. The column at the base was easily a foot thick and created a cave behind the ice falls. Getting down to this required "climbing" down the sides of the wet icy rock and my only
sitz" of the day. Sometime gravity just helps you our when there is not better footing. Which made returning the same way not possible, so back into the woods and snow and around and over the falls to catch the trail further up.




The Mountain is made of Quartzite, extremely hard yet with veins running through the case it to break. The fallen rock makes dozens of caves along the base and the side, many big enough to climb in, though I was leaving that for more warmer weather and without the ice. The rocks are all sizes and are as big a a bus.



The face of the front side is sheer with sharp drops and the trails make there way around the edge and in and out of the woods



and around and up to the summit.



The views from not that far up are spectacular with this view off to the southwest and hills in Connecticut and the Catskills in New York


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and this view to the north and Mount Greylock, 40 miles away.




The back side is just as rocky though not as sharp a drop and a little easier on the return. Coming back through the snow on the backside there were several animal tracks, a reminder of this remoteness so close to "civilization". Unfortunately the camera couldn't focus on some rather large tracks, which looked like some sort of cat, bobcat perhaps. They followed the edge of the path to the bottom and were not that old. It had me occasionally looking behind just in case until we reaches the base.

An enjoyable hike, good exercise and good company. What could be a better way to spend and afternoon off.

Traveling between Winter and Sping

My daily commute brings me 45 miles direct west, out of the hills and into the flat lands of western Massachusetts and the Connecticut River valley.

At this time of year I leave the Berkshires with snow on the grown and frozen lakes and the only sign of spring is the change in the light.




Moving east on highway the snow gradually disappears, the hillsides are bare the woods have that empty flattened look with an occasional pile of dirty snow left behind by the plows.




I arrive where there is no snow, the temperature 10 degrees warmer and spring is definitely in the air. I can be sitting in my my sunny office and talking with folks at home and they describe the heavy snow that is covering the ground and making a mess of local travel. Yet just a short distance away it is a different world.



Then at the end of the day and into the weekend I return to the land of winter. Return to Narnia before the arrival of Aslan. Only there are no ice queens here and spring will eventually come.

The most descriptive word I have heard to describe the way it has looked the last few days is "Narnia"


Snow hangs heavy on the trees and while the snow falls took a rest for most of yesterday it is back at it as I write now. Like Narnia, spring is in the air but winter is not ready to let up its grip. Mid last week we got 6-8 inches then the next day another 5 then a day and a half of rain reduced the piles by half and then another 8 inches on Friday with some pretty serious wind. Had all that rain been snow, the piles would easily be at the 3 foot mark.

So how much snow do we have? With the pluses and the minuses and the double pluses that is too much of a math problem for so early in the morning. But I'd eyeball it at 8 inches that is left.

This seems like this is the most snow we've had this year but definitely not of all the dozen years we've been here. Reminiscing last night about the snow caves the kids would build in the drifts, there has been at least another foot or so a accumulation that would need to be there to match the high points.

But spring is in the air. The morning light is stronger, the afternoon light stays longer. February is over, the longest shortest darkest month is past. Soon it will be time to patch the multitude of potholes, but that is a post in itself.

Colds Suck

Something has happened the past several weeks. Blog posts and the time for writing seem sparse and my mind is on the foggy side, which only for the past few weeks can be attributed to a head cold. The rest of it probably is a combination of a major change in the place I usually can write and many things competing for time and mental energy.

I usually get one cold a year. It comes at a time that I am overloaded with things to do and can least afford it or have just passed such a time. [yes I see the cause and effect pattern]. Colds for me often run the same course. I am usually a very good patient with major things but very impatient with the minor such as with colds or back pains or aches. My attitude is enough! lets get on with it and over it. Probably hindered somewhat that I can't really take many of the "cold remedies" without reactions that are worse that the cold. I am in the most annoying of the stages which is the coughing stage. A few days ago you'd think I was ready for a respirator and I can only truly sleep the full night in a mildly sitting up position, which is not easy to do nor that comfortable. So as the sleep gets disrupted so does the healing processes.

It will probably be over or mostly gone in a few days and I expect that when I go to work tomorrow I will be given a wide berth or glares for having spread it, though I am compulsive with the hand sanitizer and coughing in the elbow, but sometimes that is not enough.

So that is my vent about colds.

This weekend we were traveling through upstate New York. Didn't you know that traveling and hotels are good for colds? When ever we venture out that way I am always struck by how much larger the mountains and hills are than in the Berkshires. The Berkshires are hills after all and New York has the Catskills. But the valleys are wider and the passes grander and stunning.

I am noticing more how from season to season, there are many views that look the same, year after year and that it is much more evident when I have my camera at hand.

If I look at pictures of scenes from year year to year that are from about the same time of year, they are almost interchangeable.


As I have mentioned many times here, I have about a 50 mile one way commute each day to work. I think of bygone times when such a trip would have required immense planning and packing for a the long journey. It makes me remember stories my grandmother told of wagon rides over the mountains for shopping in the bigger towns that were full day events.



Now I hop on the highway and easily cruise up and down the mountains and through the mountain passes and an amount of time that would have been unimaginable when my grandparents were young.




Yet in the eight years I have been doing this commute, the views of the mountains, especially in the winter are the same as perhaps they saw many years ago. The most significant different perhaps is that the highway I travel cuts through land that is near the old main road but sometimes a hundred or so feet above as it traverses large ravines. I remember large ice waterfalls as a kid and expect that for generations and generations that was a seasonal marvel to observe.



February is sort of bleak in that much of the landscape is in hibernation. Pauses in the snowfall allow the dried out brown and dirt from the run offs to shown through. The cold wind is biting and even the dried grasses seem cold and frozen.



But the days are getting longer and the sunlight brighter. That too is something observed by many before me and hopefully many after as well.

At about 5-5:30 in the morning I am up and moving slowly looking for my first cup of coffee [I am a confirmed coffee-holic], then for a while I just sit in the dark by the window, the light of the flames from the stove make their way around the corners in the other room and create dancign shadows on the wall. Gazing in the sky I can still see stars and an occasional distant airplane. It is quiet.

The light begins to come up around the trees and the hills and it seems a peaceful hand off of night into day.



It is in these moments that I think, I meditate, I send out good thoughts to those I know and love and to folks I know only by name and sometimes just "be". It is my favorite time of the day.

I needed a peaceful picture to look at. In the ups and downs of roller coaster life this is an up hill period. So I remembered this photo from when I fed friends' chickens twice a day for a week last summer. In the morning I would bring my coffee, feed the chickens and clean things out and then sit and gaze at this view for a while before packing off to get ready for work. It was warm, the air was hazy and the winds quiet.

I can somewhat track the seasons by the sunrise over the ridge line close to our house. It runs very much north to south on the map and in winter the sunrise is clearly in the southern end and mid summer it moves slightly north of the middle. But today it was very much in the south, which puzzled me. It should be farther north by now. Perhaps it was that there was a break in the clouds several miles south and the clouds to the east were too thick.

As with most places in the east it has rained alot of late. Though when I look out to the backyard there is still a good amount of snow in the way back. We are in a January thaw, gearing up for the longest shortest month of the year and the beginning of mud season.

I no longer do my night commute in total dark, which means the days are getting longer. The days they go so quickly.

Its been over a week since I checked the blog. Much more time than usual and my mind gets that fried feeling that when I think of writing something and in the end I up just zoning out.

Its been a tough couple of weeks on several fronts. Its been cold and very busy in our piece of the Berkshires and I find I am not getting out except for chores and little time for checking in with cyber-folk. The challenges of work and home and in the country and world feel like ever growing masses and have me a little overwhelmed and discouraged. Not a place I haven't been in the past and slowly worked out of but definitely not a good place to be. Needless to say my prayers have been more emphatic and pleading of late.

Last weekend we worked on the computer room, which translates into converting a room that was primarily storage of old books and files and a large computer work station into a more den like room. While I am not a pack rat, I have accumulated old books, family pictures and the computer seems to have its own pile of documentation, disks, printer supplies that seem to just multiply even though its been weeded out many times. Sort of like the mail which seems to be replaced on the pile faster than it can be resolved. I also manage what seems like oceans of information at work, both paper and electronic, and the last thing I want to do on off hours is tackle paperwork. It can be a challenge and source of conflict within the household because it mounts up and then even tackling it piecemeal never seems enough.

But the room does look much better and though far from done, it is improved and more functional. I'll be keeping the trash people busy for weeks moving out the pieces of the workstation little by little.

That is the update from here. Definitely more personal than usual and not too colorful but I am a tenacious optimist.

Movement in the Dark

On my commute home from work the is about 15 seconds when the road dips and rounds a bend and a large wind turbine is right in front of me, gracefully and rhythmically turning in the breezes. At this time of year when I reach that point in my journey it is often dark and all that can be seen is the bright blinking red beacon alerting airplanes. Then quickly I pass and it is hidden again by the woods.

But if you look a little closer you can also see that the light does not always blink in a pattern and there the slightest blur. Both of these are cause by the blades of the turbine that can't be seen but that, when they pass in front of the light, interfere with the blinking pattern and give it that blur.

[no this is not a picture of the turbine as it is difficult to snap a shot so quickly at 70 mph.]



It was on one of these trips home in the dark, having passed the turbine, that I began to think of all that happens in the dark that we don't see and sometimes have to look closely even for a sign.

Living so close to the forest, I am often reminded of this. Noises of animals heard in the night; the road kill that is not longer there in the morning; the sense that something is out in the yard when I go out in the dark for the morning paper; the shadows that disappear when I run in the early hours. All of these are life in the dark hours.

I am someone who likes the dark and is fortunate to have good vision in being able to get around with minimal light. But sometimes even I am a bit unnerved by what I can sense and just barely hear out there, and quite honestly I'd rather not shine a light and be scared for sure.

We think of life as something we can see and something that we observe or we brightly light our paths or houses or public ways, but there is so much out there that can only be picked up by sound and by sense or, like turbine, the slightest change or that we never notice at all.

So what is this picture if it is not the turbine? It isn't anything specific, just a shot in the dark. I just aimed the camera at the moon and this is what came out.

So what do I have in common with this picture? Well I have a new shirt about the color of these tulips and on this first day back to work from vacation I am drooping almost as much as they are. But while they have found their way into the compost, I have retreated to blogland and Farmville. Yes, I dare admit that I have become moderately hooked at Farmville on Facebook. But while many load their farms with buildings and animals and decorations [this really doesn't make sense if you haven't seen it, I know], I have gone for planting just crops that look nice when ripe and have harvested so many that I can now start "buying" trees, so far well over a hundred.[Yes I know this really does sound strange] So in the virtual world of Facebook, I am doing my part in decreasing CO2. How is that for escape!



The past few days have been blistering cold caused primarily by the wind. While it has looked like blizzard conditions and snow is everywhere, there isn't that much of it, maybe a few inches. But it is everywhere.

Reentering work and evening commitments after a vacation, especially when I disconnect completely from emails and voice mail is always tough. But spending time with the family and getting to see a couple of movies and just do nothing but the bare necessary chores has been good for the soul.